Ever stay home from school because of a hurting fish?

Ralph did.

Yep, some guy named Ralph missed school one day, and came in the next morning with this note from his mom:

"Ralph was absent yesterday because he had a sore trout."

No kidding. That's what the note said.

There are more. Check out these actual written excuses from parents:

"Please excuse Joyce from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday she fell off a tree and misplaced her hip." (I sure hope she finds it before the prom!)

"Please excuse John from being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33." (I hate those lo-o-o-ng winter months!)

"Chris will not be in school today because he has an acre in his side." (Wow! Talk about growing pains!)

"John has been absent because he had two teeth taken off his face." (I hope he wasn't wearing braces!)

"My son is under the doctor's care and should not take fizical ed. Please execute him." (Ouch!)

"Please excuse Johnnie for being. It was his father's fault." (Blame it on Dad!)

"Please excuse Ray from school. He has very loose vowels." (But I hear his consonants are doing just fine!)

"George was absent yesterday because he had a stomach." (I suppose he had some vowels too, but I guess they're OK!)

"Please excuse Sara for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot." (Thanks a lot, Mom!)